The Joy of Having to Work

I found this article (even though it sounds more like an op-ed) by Claire Gutierrez from Elle Magazine moving. She explains the guilt some woman feel when they have to work and leave their child at home. The sadness they feel when they can't spend time with them.

Before Gutierrez became a writer, she took care of children; two boys in particular, Brook and Hunter. At the age of 19, she was hired when the boy's mother had recently passed away. Their father had to work. He couldn't do all of things he wanted to, but she explains the boys didn't care about what he couldn't do. They loved him regardless, as much as she feel in love with them.

After living with them, mothers would tell her she couldn't understand the love a mother has for her child. This is debatable. Gutierrez loved Brook and Hunter dearly. She explains the love she felt as "overwhelming," which I can imagine is what a mother feels.

I worked as a group worker in an after school/summer program for four years. It was hard seeing my first graders turn into fourth graders, and now their sixth graders. Some of them are as tall as me, which is quite sad.

Dealing with a group of children for a whole day during the summer is tiresome and irritating, but at the end of the day when their parents came to pick them up, they hugged me goodbye and I couldn't wait till tomorrow.

Depending on how their day was, I can only imagine the feeling the parents felt once they were reunited with their young. Seeing the anxiety rush out of my mothers face when she picks up my 3-year-old sister from her babysitter tells me how overwhelmed a mother can be.

"Why did I have a baby, if I didn't intend to raise her myself?"

She explains how the guilt will "plague" her, but she understands she must make a living for her child. To give him or her a "decent life." Gutierrez mother, I believe, had some part on this. Her mother a Hungarian immigrant was a house wife. She told Gutierrez and Gutierrez sibling to not be like her. Her mother wanted them to go out and get an education which most mothers want for all of their children. Parents always want their child to have a life better than the lives they had.